Xscape

story & illustrations

by Becky Pan 

Life with my parents sucked long before I realized it.

  Dudes, I think you will surely agree with me that there is a kind of animal species dangerous to us six“teens”─parents. They are unpredictable, uncontrollable and worst of all─they are always right. Always. I mean, no matter how hard we try to convince them of something, if they already have a so-called “wonderful” plan for us, none of our ideas matters to them.

  Anyway, as I was saying earlier, my relationship with my parents was horrible. Every day I’d wake up into the same nightmare, as if I’d accidentally pressed the replay button too many times. I’d see my mom looming before me screaming the “What-are-you-still-doing-in-bed-do-you-have-any-idea-what-time-it-is-you’re-so-going-to-be-late-now-get-out-of-bed-and-go-eat-your-breakfast!” part over and over again like a VERY annoying high-pitch alarm clock. 

  “Mom,” I would complain, “no one eats breakfast at home. It’s so lame! All the cool guys hang out at the cafeteria. Do you want me to look like a loser? I’m eating out.” 

  Okay, so perhaps I had spoken the wrong thing because my mom then erupted into a volcano. Well, not literally, but it was no less deadly. You could almost see the lava flowing out of her eyes, the steam hissing from her mouth and worst of all─the thunderous roaring.

   “Olivia, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO HANG OUT WITH THE DRUGGIES? IT’S BAD INFLUENCE AND YOU WILL END UP IN JAIL SOMEDAY!”

Really? Is that so? I thought, you’ve just woken the whole neighborhood, mom. “All I want, is some of my personal space. I can’t stand that you’re always buzzing around me and interfering with my choice of friends.” I grumbled. And yes, as you can predict, the volcano just transformed into a nuclear bomb. 

  But hey, don’t judge me so harshly! I am already 16! Surely I am capable of handling my own life. There is no reason for my parents to rudely butt in and ground me every time I request to hang out with friends. 

  Little did I know that it was this thought that led me to the biggest disaster of my life.…

It was another normal day at school. My friends Katrina, Natalie and I hung out as usual in the hallway, peeking and squealing as guys walked by. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that Katrina and Natalie are the party type─they go around flirting with guys they meet, especially Katrina. You should’ve seen how “hungry” she was. On the contrary, I am the “goodie good” kid, thanks to my mom.

  They only came over to my place once, which turned out to be a total nightmare. My parents found neither of them “appropriate friends” and told me to break up with them; on the other hand, Katrina and Natalie saw my parents as “ridiculous creatures.” I was never allowed to mention their names again, and was “separated” (or so my parents think) from them. However, I never listened to my parents. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with such cool girls? 

  Anyway, we were standing and chatting there in the hallway when suddenly a deep voice from behind us said, “Hey, Kat.” We whirled around. Leaning on the wall was Chad, the football captain with a crooked smile on his face. 

  “Wanna go to Rick’s on Saturday? I heard that they’re holding a party, and well … I think we could have a little of our ‘private time.’”

Katrina’s gorgeous eyes gleamed. “All right then, sexy, see you on Sat.”

Chad shifted his balance to the other foot, then with a sly smile he said, “Oh, and don’t forget to bring your two cute babes as well,” motioning at me and Natalie. “they’ll sure know how to hype up the party.” “O’ course,” Kat replied, looking at us, “surely you girls will come, you can’t miss Rick’s.” Natalie nodded eagerly, “Definitely, I’m so going to be there.” 

  By this time, my palms were slippery and my forehead was coated with beads of sweat; anxiety and uneasiness settled inside of me. Oh please no, don’t ask me. I pleaded silently. I knew only too well how my parents would react if I ever brought up the topic, much less attending it, and yet I didn’t want to look lame and stupid in front of the boy of my dreams. 

  Well, apparently the odds weren’t in my favor that day because Chad then turned to me and asked, “What ‘bout you hun? You coming?”

  I cursed viciously in my head at my parents and answered in a quivering voice, “Well … I … umm … I’m sorry, can’t go.” Kat and Nat stared at me in disbelief, as if I’d just dropped in from outer space and hissed, “What are you doing, Liv? Do you have any idea what you’re saying?” Instantly, I felt the blood rise to my cheeks and I blushed with embarrassment. “I’m really sorry, but … but my mom she … you know … ” I wasn’t even able to finish the sentence. “Oh no, your mom again?” Kat said in a disgusted tone, “Seriously, when are you going to outgrow the ‘mommy’ thing?” “Well, well, let’s not be too hard on her.” Chad said in a mocking voice, “Everyone has their own issues with parents.” 

That was it. The smirk on Chad’s face was the last straw. “All right! I’ll go!” I blurted out. “As long as I sneak out quietly … I guess I could….” A broad smile grew on Chad’s face and he winked at me. “Seems like our little girl’s grown up. Well done, I’ll be expecting you on Sat.” With that note, he strolled away. Kat turned to me, “I can’t believe you were so stupid, Liv! You made us look like total losers! When Chad says something to you, you simply don’t say no. You just don’t, but at any rate, I’m glad that you’re finally coming. We’ll let you know what a good time you can have, and … uh ... I gotta go, see ya!” She turned and walked away with Natalie. 

  Only then did I let out my breath. What was I thinking? I screamed in my head, I can’t go to the party! I just can’t get myself to sneak out late at night. I dreaded even more declining Chad, Kat and Nat. With guilt weighing heavily on my mind, I started to plan how I was going to escape from home as I trudged home warily.

  Tick tock, tick tock. 

  I bit my lip, hoping to hide my anxiety. My parents sat beside me at the table eating dinner and babbling something that sounded to me like this: “How’s the blah blah blah blah at school, blahhhhhhh blah blah blah homework and review blah bla bla be a good kid.” I didn’t hear a thing they said. The only thought rushing around in my head like a very irritating hamster was the event that was about to happen. Two more hours, I told myself, I’ll fake sick and go to bed early. After about another three hours, when my parents have long gone to bed, I’ll listen and see whether they’re asleep, then I’ll quietly tiptoe down the stairs to the back door and Katrina will be waiting in a car for me. I took a deep breath and exhaled, as I ran over the steps again in my head, fearing that something unexpected might occur. It’s going to be all right, I assured myself, stop scaring yourself with those stupid “what ifs.”

Tick tock, tick tock.

  “OH MY GOD! I can’t believe I did it!” I screamed in Katrina’s car. “Yeah, ya see? Natalie told you it ain’t that hard dealing with your folks. Now, let’s go off PARTYING!” With whoops and yells we sped onwards to Rick’s.

  Even from a far distance, I heard the deafening disco music and the beats.

  Above the entrance was a big banner with large words that read “ALL DRINKS ARE ON THE HOUSE!” The house was lit up with different colors of torches and large ribbons dangling from all the windows. People swarmed everywhere and the laughter and cheering noise they made echoed around the courtyard. 

  “Wow,” I gasped, stunned by the view. I could hardly take in the size of the party. “C’mon, let’s go look around and have some fun.” Katrina chirped happily, “Oh look! Here comes Chad.” I looked toward the direction she was pointing at and my jaw dropped. 

  Chad and a bunch of guys, all buff and ripped, strolled toward us. They all wore leather jackets and combat boots with black designer jeans that went surprisingly well with their “over-tight” stylish shirts. I had a hard time keeping myself from drooling over the eight packs that pressed out under their clothes.

  “Yo,” Chad said in a husky tone as he walked towards us, “seems like you all made it to the party, welcome babes.” He looked us all over with seductive eyes saying, “I’ve brought you some dance partners. Meet my bros, Tanner, Kyle and Dylan. You’ll have a great time at the party with them. Enjoy ladies!” 

  The first thought that popped into my head when Chad finished speaking was: Whoa, whoa, wait a sec bro. I don’t even know you that well, let alone your buddies. So why don’t we just all chill down, have a nice cup of tea like civilized humans and get to know each other a bit more? But instantly, I felt stupid for having the thought. Look at all the people dancing and drinking around you! I told myself, this is a place for fun, not a place for us to be lame little kids. Therefore, uncomfortable as I was with the situation, I forced a tight smile and joined them on the dance floor.

  It wasn’t long before the uneasiness churning in my stomach turned into wave after wave of nausea. The  strong odor of perfume mixed with sweat kept flowing into my nostrils, the thundering music was pounding in my ear, threatening to impale my eardrums, and worst of all, the constant rubbing and contact with so many people, with a lot of body parts exposed, made me want to puke.

     Finally I couldn’t stand it. “Hey guys,” I said to Tanner and Natalie, who were having a very good time making out beside me, “I’m not feelin’ very well, I’m going to the bar and get some drinks.” They were having such fun that they didn’t even bother to answer. So I made my way through the enormous crowd to the bar, ordered a drink, and sat down.

  Sitting away from the crowd helped clear my mind. For the first time, I started looking around the house. I saw people dancing and screaming, cheering and laughing, and as I turned my head, I spotted Chad. He was talking with another guy that I didn’t know and I saw cash and white powder exchanged between them.

  I was baffled. Partying at night may not be a good thing, but drugs? That was too overboard and I couldn’t take it. As I watched, Chad pushed his way through the crowd and handed some to Katrina. She went wide-eyed─with excitement and started to look for Nat and me.

  Panic welled up inside me. No no, I thought. There is no way I could agree on drugs! I looked frantically around to see if anybody had sighted me. Lucky me, Tanner was looking and pointing toward my direction. 

  I ran. 

  Through the front door, past the gateway and into the starless night. I caught a cab and got in before the front door was opened and Chad and his gang emerged.

  I was still panting hard after I snuck into my bedroom and hid myself under the covers. I was terrified about the things that happened and with dread I found no choice but to tell my parents the truth. After Chad saw my reaction, I knew that there was no going back. He would eventually come to me and do something horrible to keep my mouth shut, like I would even want to tell the police. I drifted into dreamless sleep as I wished I had listened to my parents and never would have ended up in this mess. 

  Tomorrow. I will face my parents and my punishment, for this is all my fault, I thought as the reality drifted away and I was washed into my dreams.

The Monster Roars

story by Lily Wu

illustrations by Yi-ju Cheng

As I walked out the exam room of the Basic Competence Test, I felt quite relieved because I had finally gone through the three-year-long ordeal. All I did was take pointless tests while no one told me what they were for or  how I should prepare for them. For times I had thought of running away from it all. And I did. Now I was freed at last…. As I wandered on the street, a strange-looking man handed me a flyer about traveling to a place called “Noexam.” The ad really attracted me. To celebrate the end of the test, I signed up right away. After all, anything was definitely going to be much more fun than my dull junior high school life!

  The first place the tour guide took me to was the off-shore island of Onmaxe―Examisfun Island. There was a popular theme park in the center of the island called Testme. But unfortunately, we arrived there so late―it was already five o’clock in the afternoon; all that we could do was go back to the hotel and come back the next day. In order to make it up to me, the tour guide offered a free cable-car ride. On the way back, I felt quite dizzy and gradually fell asleep….

      When I opened my eyes again, I found myself in the hotel lobby. It was rather quiet, which aroused my curiosity. I asked the receptionists where all the guests had gone, but they replied with an unfathomable smile giving the same answer, “ There is a BIG show tonight. Please make sure you’re in good shape to attend it.” Not knowing what to expect, I went into the hall in excitement and fear. 

  When I opened the door to the hall, I was immediately confronted by a gigantic monster―its spiky head was made up of sharp red pens, its body formed by scrunched test papers and it kept roaring, “You just failed! Do it again!” “Why didn’t you finish the report? You can not go home without finishing the worksheet!” Its hoarse voice reminded me of the strictest teacher in my junior high school, who gave me such a hard time during my teenage years. All she did was make us write all sorts of test papers so that we could score full marks in every test. That “TEST MONSTER” kept lunging forward, trying to make me face my biggest nightmare. I screamed louder and louder, but no one came to my rescue. All I could think of at that moment was to flee as far as I could. 

  Soon I realized one thing―the test monster ran as fast I did, which meant the distance between the frightening creature and me always remained the same. This shocking discovery inspired me to change my strategy. I gathered up the nerve to fight the monster face-to-face. I stopped at the lobby and waited for it. “What do you want?” I shouted at it. “I want you to answer these questions!” That monster howled in its terrifying voice. I looked down at the papers it gave me and found I had done these kinds of questions in junior high. Wanting to make the monster go away, I started to do the exercises without hesitation. As I got down to the task, I found it was no longer cruel torture since I actually knew the answers to the questions. The more happily I did the exercises, the smaller the monster became. 

  All of a sudden, I heard a strange sound from the monster: “Ahaha…!” Then the monster turned into smoke. About two or three seconds later, that scary test monster vanished. The only thing left on the floor was a letter. In that letter were three tips: 

1.Prepare before taking a test. Do as many exercises as you can.

2.Relax when you take the test and put your best foot forward.

3.Don’t run away! 

Love, Exam Monster 

That letter taught me a lesson that our teacher hadn’t before. Although all the teachers told me to study hard in junior high school, nobody told me “how.” After having read the letter the monster gave, I finally understood why. This monster helped me to face my nightmare (actually tests are my nightmare), so I’m no longer afraid of taking any test if I have studied for it. No longer do I view exams a stressful thing.

“Wake up, Miss! This is the final stop of the cable car ride!” After I woke up, I found that all the “Test Monster” stuff was just a dream. I continued my journey. A few days later, when I got back to Taiwan, I almost forgot that dream. As soon as I arrived, I received my Basic Competence Test report card. To my surprise, I did better than I had thought before, which reminded me of that dream. I also found a piece of paper placed next to the flyer, and it looked exactly the same as the monster’s letter. “Is it just a dream?” I wondered….

Room 16

story & illustrations

by Sophia Chang

Seeing beautiful Nikki at the school gate, I definitely don’t want to go to that goddamned cram school today. I want to go somewhere else, somewhere I don’t know. The weather today is just right for an adventure.

  Nikki is the party animal in our class. She’s also the cheerleader. She’s boys’ dreamboat and girls’ idol. If girls want invitations from the sexy athletes, they’d better hang out with Nikki. She always gets the best clothes, the best shoes, the newest cellphone and everything. I know what you are thinking. No, she’s not a bimbo. Instead, she’s super smart. Simply put, she has it all. Compared with her, I’m nobody. Nikki is everything I want to be.

  Curious about where Nikki is heading for, I grab her, asking, “Nikki, can I tag along?” Surprisingly, she gives me a friendly grin saying, “Of course!”

  Now we’re here. 

  I’m worried and I’m sweating and I’m anxious because this is the first time I skip class. I don’t even know where I get the guts, but I’m so excited. It’s like Romeo and Juliet running off, but my Romeo is a she, Nikki. Standing beside her bathes me in her glamour.

  “Okay, so where are we going?” I hold on to Nikki’s arm and ask in high spirits. “I’ll tell you later.” “Huh?” Before I figure out her words, Nikki seizes my hand and takes me to the end of the street. There stands a tall and well-built guy. I can tell that he is so not 16. He’s about 20 or something.

  “Surprise!” Nikki lets out a shout. 

  “Who is he? You didn’t mention there would be somebody else.” Though the guy looks friendly, I still gotta make sure who he is and where he is from, just in case. “He’s Dayton. I met him on the Internet.” 

  “The Internet? Hey,” I whisper in her ear, “are you sure this is okay?” 

  “Come on, we can’t go anywhere without him. Trust me, this will be fun!” claims Nikki with her charming smile.

Wandering and wondering where we are going, well, it’s only me doing the wandering and wondering—Dayton and Nikki walk in front of me, leading me to the unknown. After two right turns and a left and another three rights and four other lefts, we finally arrive at the “destination.” I guarantee that I can never keep the roads and alleys and lanes in mind. Truthfully, it is a little scary for me to find Dayton being so familiar with the place, which somehow looks like a pub—hey, no, it actually is one. Getting nervous, I stop.

“Hey, why are you stopping here? Let’s come on in!” Nikki pushes me forward lightly. 

“I …, ” 

“What? Are you regretting? Are you thinking about going home? Don’t be silly, girl, you said you want to do something interesting! Come on, let’s go!” I’m not sure if Nikki’s getting mad or something, but I surely see Dayton frown when he senses my hesitation.

Yeah, I asked for this, and so I’m gonna deal with it. What’s more, this is what an adventure should be like! There’s nothing to fear since I have Nikki.

After taking a deep breath, I follow Dayton inside this place I call a world for the grown-ups, inside this world named Room 16. “What the heck is your friend doing? Tell her to stop acting like a wimp!” That is Dayton’s voice, sounding violent. And then it is Nikki’s, which I think sounds kinda nervous. It is so not Nikki, “I’m sorry, but it’s the first time for Jasmine. Just please give her another chance.…” Another chance? I mean, Dayton is annoyed about this? Moreover, I find it puzzling when Nikki said “give her another chance.” It sounds more like Nikki’s asking to be forgiven. How come? Nikki never needs to give in to anyone. Who on earth is this Dayton?

“Hey, Nikki, may I ask you something?” I put forth this sensitive question carefully, “Is Dayton your boyfriend?” 

“Uh … Not really. He … he …,” 

I can see Nikki’s hollow smile is a really bitter one. Thus, I decide to keep the question to myself.

My train of thought is pulled back to the reality by the booms and the clap-claps and the ahhhs and the lalas. The pop music and hubbubs are about to rock the roof. I see men and women, or you can say boys and girls, shaking their butts, nodding their heads, putting their hands up, slapping their thighs, singing, yelling …. It’s a bit too much for me. They act like total lunatics!

Nikki drags me to the center of the dance floor and asks Henry the DJ to add her song to the playlist. “Whoop!” Nikki is herself again, the energetic and seductive Nikki when she dances. Now it’s our turn shaking our butts, nodding our heads, putting our hands up, slapping our thighs, singing, yelling and everything. To be honest, this is fun. I’m like floating on a bed of clouds that taste like marshmallows. Meanwhile, I can tell that half of the boys stick their eyes onto Nikki’s sexy curves. They are all trying to flirt with her.

That’s when I suddenly smell something awfully weird. It’s like some tobacco or—BOOM! The word I never dare to think of crosses my mind. Marijuana.

 God, why am I here? Just when I feel like leaving, someone taps me on the shoulder. “Hi,” a young guy with a mustache greets me. “You are alone? Want some of these?” He hands out some pills. This, totally freaks me out. “Eh, I’m sorry, but my man is over there waiting for me. Thanks anyway.” I lie instead and get away.

When I luckily get rid of the mustache guy, I bump into Dayton, who is also heading back to Nikki. “Not bad, huh?” He says with a sly smile, holding two glasses of greenish liquid, “Want some?” He says as he hands me one glass. “Uh, thanks dude, but I’m not thirsty.” My throat is as dry as day-old toast, but I don’t want to take any risks. “Hey, just relax and take it.” Oh, that’s a big misunderstanding. I’m not trying to be modest or else, I just don’t want the wine or whatever in his glass. I just know that.

I try to act natural, “Umm … where’s the restroom, excuse me? My stomach doesn’t feel well.… I think I’m about to puke.” I know this is an out-of-date excuse for getting away, but I’m doing my best. To my relief, Nikki speaks right before Dayton is about to say something, “It’s right beside the gateway. Are you okay?” “Yeah, I’m fine, thanks.” Where did she say the place is? Right beside the gateway. Bingo! That is more than a perfect geographical location for an escape.

Of course I don’t go to the exit right away, just in case Dayton will come right after me and give me a back suplex. Don’t ever call me crazy because you’ll never want to further piss off a furious man. I decide to hide behind the door with the sign reading W.C. on it and see what happens next.

Taken by surprise, I see Dayton slapping Nikki’s face. I am about to shout out loud, but force myself to stop before I make a sound. Dayton looks so angry. His eyes are burning with fire. I can’t hear what they say, but I guess it is about Nikki’s letting me go. She’s a goof, for she ruins Dayton’s plan of roping me into their world; and I’m a chicken, for I run away. I’m sorry, Nikki, but I can’t help. I’m so sorry.

I need to go. I call a taxi and go home directly.

It is a sleepless night. I keep thinking about what happened during the day. I have finally figured out Nikki’s words—give her another chance. I think, Nikki was begging to be forgiven for herself, not for me. It gradually dawns on me that their relationship is more complicated than I thought. They aren’t simply a couple; neither is their relationship based on true feelings. Dayton offers all kinds of “fun” stuff for Nikki, so she has to dance to his tunes.

Nikki is always the leader in our class. People like to parrot her ideas. She’s trendy, bright, and looks like the happiest girl I’ve ever known. But that’s what I knew about her. Now I know I was totally wrong. No matter how brilliant she is in front of us, she’s nothing but a yes-girl in Dayton’s presence.

Maybe I don’t have Nikki’s glamour, but I have something else she doesn’t.

I’m honest with myself and I have a free soul.